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The instructions for
thinking outside the box
are printed on the outside.
Want to get out of your box?
work with Dianna

This exercise helps you create an overview of your life to date, to provide insights into the impact of significant events and how you have coped.

Find a large piece paper, and on it draw a line which represents your life so far, indicating the significant experiences and transi­tions, the people and events that were/are significant in making your life what it is today. Start with your birth and work up to the present point in time. When you have finished this line, find a different coloured pen and draw a second line, which corresponds to the first, but which indicates the emotional highs and lows you have experienced. Take 15 minutes to do this. Having completed both parts of the task, meditate on your lifeline and focus on the following questions.

1.       Where have you made significant decisions about your work or personal life?

2.       Where have you just drifted?

3.       What patterns or trends are there in your lifeline?

4.       Did you consider other people in your lifeline?

5.       How have these people affected you?

6.       How do you feel about your past life experiences and the ‘you’ who lived them?

Again, what has doing this exercise told you, or reminded you, about yourself? What has made you the person you are, and what of your past and present life do you want to take into the future? When I do this exercise I am reminded of people who have been instrumental in helping me change and develop. For instance, important relationships with teachers at school, and college, who were encouraging and supportive; the challenge of working abroad; taking a leap of faith into a new job or relationship; friends and family members who have been loyal during the hard times; the pain of loss, through death, or separation; and the joy of new sights, sounds and experiences. All of these have had a profound effect on my life and in shaping who I now am. This knowledge helps to remind me of what I value and want to take forward, and what it may now be time to let go of.

In order to help you to further identify what you value and ant to take into the future, work quickly through the following questionnaire, and see what strikes you as important.

1.       What is important in your life? Rate these items on a scale of 1—3 (1 being high and 3 being low).

*         a loving relationship

*         being attractive

*         a satisfying marriage/partnership

*         long holidays

*         being creative

*         having an impact on the world

*         opportunity to make your own decisions

*         a beautiful home

*         good health

*         travel

*         friends

*         a good sex life

*         lots of books

*         world peace

*         being treated fairly

*         confidence

*         influence and power in your community

*         spirituality

*         religion

*         someone who needs you

*         someone to take care of

*         order

*         a closeknit family

*         other

2.       What is important at work? (1—3)

*         to work alone

*         regular hours and guaranteed pay

*         totally unstructured work-day

*         self-employment

*         good supervision

*         having a variety of tasks

*         working in a small organization

*         little responsibility and risks

*         short travelling time

*         other

3.       Choose 3 things from the list below that gives you the most satisfaction in your work.

*         to be excited by what you’re doing

*         to help others solve problems

*         to contribute to society with worthwhile work

*         to be recognized as an authority

*         to motivate yourself

*         to work things out

*         to work within a structure

*         to find new solutions

*         to have a choice of time

*         to make a lot of money

*         toworkinateam

*         to work outside

*         to be respected for your work

*         other

Personal aims and goals - Ask yourself the following questions

 1.       What don’t you want from your life?

2.       What should you want according to the significant people in your life?

3.       What have you always wanted to do some day?

4.       What would you do if you could do anything you wanted for a year?

5.       How much money would you like to be earning in a year?

How are your personal aims different from your present reality?

	Have I really gone for what I want
	Are my goals based on pure fantasy?
	Are they achievable?
	Are they life-enhancing?
	Do they hurt anybody?
	Are they legal?
	Are they good for all concerned?
	Can I see myself as already having them?
	Am I willing to undertake any difficulties associated?
	Can I handle the rewards associated with achieving them?
	Am I willing to take any responsibilities associated?

Having gained some new insights, find a second sheet of paper and sketch out what you would like the rest of your lifeline to look like. Pinpoint the year of your death, and then fill in the years between. If I were doing my lifeline I would like to consolidate my career over the next five years; to have moved away from training into consultancy, research and writing, be more settled in my life and working part-time.

From forty-five to fifty, I intend to be working and living abroad for large parts of the year. I will have gone on a world tour before I am fifty. At that age, I shall live in the country, in semi-retirement, writing novels and enjoying a full and satisfying emotional and social life. So, how about you, what do you want? Give it a go! Spend as long as you like reaching decisions that make sense for you and the life you would like to be leading.

When you are working through the lifeline consider the following if it helps to give it some structure; ignore it if it restricts your creativity. Feel free to use lots of different coloured pens and symbols.

*         significant changes in family relationships

*         when work patterns change

*         when you retire

*         where you would ideally like to live

*         when the children will be leaving home

*         what significant relations begin and end

*         what you accomplish

*         what your life will have meant to others

*         what you want included as essential

*         how you want to be spending your last years of life

Having achieved a sense of the shape of your future life, stop for a while, and think about what you have discovered. You may choose to change aspects of your lifeline when you have had time to reflect, but at this point you deserve a break; creating your lifeline can be quite taxing emotionally. Whatever happens, though, don’t forget to keep checking out what you’ve written. I have kept all the lifelines I have completed over the years, and my projections and predictions into the future have usually come true. Make sure that your life projections represent what you really want.