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The six-step change model works for both work and personal life and is direct, straightforward and results-oriented:

Step One: Gather Data

First, you need self-cooperation and commitment. Start by exploring the problem to figure out what is happening. Don’t accept your diagnosis or view of the problem.

Step Two: Study the Data and Develop an Understanding of the Problem

Identify the facts (not your interpretation) – just the facts, as if you were looking at a video.

Step Three: Develop a Plan

Study the various lists of flawed thinking patterns and identify which one/s you may be using in this situation:

	10 Common Self Defeating Beliefs
	13 Forms of Distorted Thinking
	10 Common Irrational Thoughts
	5 Common Fallacies

Treating your thoughts (my boss hates me; my spouse is probably unfaithful) as if they were uttered by an external person whose mission is to make your life miserable and then marshall evidence against the thoughts. Avoid blame, use humor and self-congratulation.

Step Four: Dispute your Problem Thinking

Actively and relentlessly dispute your flawed thinking patterns.

15 Ways to Improve your EQ

Step Five: Replace Problem Thinking with New Thinking

Develop new thinking to replace the old. This new thinking must meet several criteria:

1. It must be more accurate and true in real life than the old thinking. So not try to think things that are not true (it is not a Pollyanna approach). When you carefully examine the old, you can usually discern that the old thinking was, in fact, irrational. New replacement thoughts must pass the tests of truthfulness and accuracy, or the system won’t work. Why should you impose more incorrect thinking on yourself?
2. The new thinking must be reasonable and achievable. Grandiose or extremely radical new thinking isn’t likely to work (unless you are a radical sort of person). People rarely change their thinking in radical ways (outside of cults). Thought changes must be relatively small and not significantly incompatible with the rest of your beliefs and attitudes. If you want to make large-scale changes in your belief system, a longer-term plan must be adopted and it should include small steps to get there.
3. The new thinking must be acceptable to you. If it violates your core values or religious views, it probably won’t last, even if you think it will.

Step Six: Reinforce and Sustain New Thinking

Reward and support them in your daily work and personal life. Behavior and thinking changes are usually uncomfortable at first. It may be useful at this stage to enlist the active involvement of others, especially if others are to benefit from it. The old ways of thinking are likely to be resilient and can easily bounce back before new thinking is solidly entrenched. Use your coach to cheerlead and point out the benefits of your new thinking. (You do have a coach, don’t you? If not, why are you doing this alone? If you are unable to ask for help very easily, use this six-step change model to change your thinking!)

Summary

At its best, this approach can work wonders in a short period of time. Some people can rapidly learn to notice and label their thinking and then change it to great benefit, especially when motivated. Most people can learn this technique with relative ease and can implement significant changes that are sustainable, provided someone (such as a coach) consistently reminds and reinforces these changes over a period of several months.

Even so, humans tend to slip back into old patterns and its helps to have reinforcement available for extended periods of time. This can include simple reminders like small signs around the office, a note posted on the fridge, a regular journal with a commitment to long-term change, or ongoing intermittent phone calls with a coach. If you are making work-related changes, it is useful to recruit team members and co-workers to help with the process, if this would not embarrass you.

Origins and Limitations

Click here to Explore Your Belief Systems

Click here for the ABC Change Model for learning optimism