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What names do you call yourself?   

When you make a mistake, do you say...

· What an idiot! How can you be so stupid!

· Can’t you get anything right! What a loser!

· There you go again! You’re not really up to it, are you?!!

Who else has talked to you this way in the past?

Why are you still listening to them?

You can’t change your past, but you can change the way you talk to yourself today:

· Start by making a LONG list of all the good things you have ever done

· Catch yourself saying nasty things to yourself· Exclaim: Stop it!!

· Say the opposite to yourself, that you have achieved a lot of good things

· Recite your list of achievements to yourself

· Regularly review your list of shoulds and tell yourself it is OK to be less than perfect

· Convince yourself to be proud of what you have done and of what you are working on

 

Your Strengths

 

Why do you think you have so few strengths worth celebrating? How many of the following apply to you?

· Because everyone has always pointed out your shortcomings - as you do yourself.

· Because you rarely get any positive feedback for a job well done

· Because the things you do well are so familiar to you that you take them for granted

· Because you have learned to focus only on your mistakes

 

 

Audit your strengths

 

This is not as easy as it seems because you will have discounted your strengths:

· Find a good listener to help you review everything you have done

· Anyone who hasn’t done what you’ve done will be more objective about what you can do

· Discuss every work and non-work project you have been involved in over the last 5 years

· Strive to avoid discounting the other person’s attempts to name your strengths

 

Celebrate your strengths

 

Believe it or not, this is THE most important step. It is possible to amplify the impact of positive (or negative) events. Both thinking about and/or talking to others about positive events produces positive moods. Therefore, capitalize on positive events by telling others about them, celebrating them or just thinking about them more. This has been shown to increase positive mood and life satisfaction.

· Make a list of your strengths and read it to yourself regularly, adding to it as you go

· Praise yourself for what you have achieved

· Compare yourself favorably with peers who have not done what you have done

· Review your strengths whenever you are feeling particularly defeated

 For Quick Tips on Improving Self-Esteem send an email
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